Letter to myself: 240215

{New beginings}

I believe that everyone has their own life path, regardless if they create it or they follow fate. We meet all sorts of people along the way. Who becomes important to you? Or who starts fading aways, leaving your life? Its often different for everyone. Take example, in classrooms, we are given equal chance to know everyone, but who you become good friends with, is all different.

A lot of times, we meet people cause we're at similar stages of our lives or we have events that bring us together. But in the end, all of us have our own individual lives and I must learn to embrace that.

Your life may not be as glamorous as others but so long as it's worth while to you, it's good enough.

There will be times when you'll be afraid, really really afraid. And there will be times when you'll feel fed up and just want to quit. And there will be times when you'll feel lonely like you're all alone. But all i am saying is, there will be tough times, but do you really want to quit now? Constantly remind yourself why you're doing this. The experience will be worthwhile.

I don't know when it started. But this period marks the start of me creating a life I want for myself.

And for now, jazlyn ching. I think you're doing a pretty good job and I'm proud of you :)

"I'm trying my hardest to be the bravest I can be."

To those I've lost contact with.

I believe its high time I moved on and shut off.
Goals and objectives change.
Now, my needs and wants are different.
It was seem very selfish, but I never said I wasn't.

Was scrolling my contacts and chats, and deleting those that I no longer talked to.

Some, I just felt like meh.

Some, I just felt like you're a nice person but i'm sorry we didnt become closer.

Some, I am really grateful for your guidance and help before. I will never forget it, even if I no longer have your contact.

And lastly, some, who had meant so much to me before. I swear you were important. But alas, our relationship couldn't last the test of time. It could be cause, I didn't make the effort, or it could be you, or it could be the both of us. Whichever way it was, I'm sorry, it ended. And towards the end, regardless what reason, I choose to leave.

"If one day I ever do, disappear or fade away from your life slowly. Do not worry. For I am a coward, and I'm leaving cause I fear. The pain that's to come when you do. Cause forever is a fairytale."

I won't ever forget what I went through with all of you, from the mehs to those who meant shitloads to me.

But I'm sorry.